How to Avoid Hurt in Your Life

How often do you hear people complain from having been hurt by this person or that thing? Often? Yes it is true that, many people are hurt every day of their waking moments. While this is a fact, the issue is that, we fail to appreciate and comprehend the source of all our hurts. Know that: we are hurt by either a thing or people; and nothing beyond these two elements. How many times haven’t you heard people complain about getting hurt either by someone’s actions or something? Less or several? Hurt is a surge of feeling of disappointment we feel whenever someone or something goes against the expectation we hold up to them. When that thing or that person failed to be controlled by you, the feeling of hurt and disappointment settle inside of you. We are hurt in one way or the other by the things and people we love sometimes. Often. There are others who are hurt by their partners too. Haven’t made the above, two familiar questions beg asking: why do the things I love hurt me? And if love is supposed to bring happiness why does it hurt? 

Don’t be disillusioned about the truth of your true-self. Your highest self has peace, purity, happiness and love in abundance right inside of you. In fact you authentic self (your true self) contrary to your false self (your ego) is peaceful and not peaceless. You are a creator, and co-creator of your world with the universe around you. If you have happiness in abundance inside of you then, why will you look elsewhere for that satisfaction? In fact, why will you look up to something or someone to show you happiness and love? Scripture says that, for lack of knowledge my people perish. We’re hurt by the lack of awareness for our highest self. If you have gain the understanding of the above message then, I will look right into your face and tell you that, no one hurts you; you do it yourself consciously and unconsciously. You may ask: How? The fact is that, we’re hurt by the things and people we invest our love in. In the below paragraphs, I’m going to share with you briefly why you get hurt and how to avoid it in your life to get connected to the Supreme being that gave form (beingness) to you when you were  formless (non-beingness). God created you with boundless of opportunities and gifts within. All you have got to do is to manifest these gifts and opportunities from inside out rather than outside in. 

How do I get hurt? Why do the things I love bring hurt to me often? These questions elicit a very frank response. As discussed above, we bring hurt to ourselves by the things and people in our surroundings (immediate environment often) through several means among which include; 

High attachment to the things/people:

Attachment to things and people has almost always been the root cause of our hurts in life. Today’s world is replete with material acquisitions that have changed our feelings and the way we see things distorting our thoughts from “us” to “me”. Imagine a friend mistakenly dropped your mobile phone into a bucket of water. This phone happens to be your only means of communication. How are you going to feel? Hurt? Or disappointed? Be my guest! In the reverse form: Imagine the same scenario but this time the mobile phone does not belong to you but rather your company. How would you react when it fell into the same water? Hurt? Or Normal? Your guess is right! Getting attached to something or someone creates a sense of ownership inside of you which brings hurt when something happen to those things. We get too blind to the extent of seeing our possessions as us. You are not the cars, houses, mobile phones, laptops, companies, televisions and shoes you have earned for yourself. The true you is right inside of you. The true you is that, you are a soul. Fact is that, all these possessions you have acquired for yourself are not truly yours. You only a caretaker or in Ghana, we’ll say, “you are a watchman”. When we get too attached to someone and the person fail to measure up to your expectation in either the way the person behave or talk to you, you will go berserk. Why should this happen? Response: because you felt disappointed in what s/he did. The nature of this world has created the “me” consciousness that has created a cycle of hurt in the life of people. The Bible sums this up when it says that, where your treasure is, there your heart is. So, to be able to wean yourself out of this energy drainer, you have to begin to perceive things in the right perspective. Don’t atrophy your energy by allowing yourself to be hurt by the people and the things surrounding you. Watch the way you get too attached to things you’re supposed to be impersonal with and do not rely on someone for love. As stated above, your truest self has love in abundance and anyone who look elsewhere for love is marking himself out as a victim to others.

Our expectation on the things/people:

While we believe that we’re all souls in this world, we must also learn to respect the fact that, we are different in terms of the fulfillment of our destiny. And to respect the above, we must understand that, we cannot make people do what we want of them almost every time and every day. The truth is: why will you want to control my consciousness? Why will you get hurt if I did what I felt right doing? Though you and someone may claim the same earthly parentage, it doesn’t mean all of you are the same in the truest sense. Yes we are all SOULS from the soul world yet our destiny is different. You become hurt because you held up to me an expectation in terms of behavior which when I fail to conform you feel a surge of disappointment and hurt. Remember: no one can be like you; so you shouldn’t expect people to put up your dance to your or any music. Learn to treat everybody in their own terms; behavior; believes and attitudes. It’s in when you learn the good rewarding attitude of tolerance that you can appreciate people and view people’s action from the purview of their own perspective. Understand that: Everyone else is a soul like you that must be respected, loved, tolerated and appreciated.

Revenging/avenging for things done against you:

To attain you true-self, it’s important to grapple with the fact that, belief is never the truth. There’s only one truth in this world and it’s that, ignorance has been one of the cause of human suffering from ages. We live in a world that measure ignorance by someone’s lack of formal education. Ignorance goes beyond that boundary. When an ignorant person does something against you, why will you be moved passionately to revenge for what the person did? In fact why will you be brimming with revenge? The moment the thought of avenging/revenging comes to mind, you become the person who hurt you. He acted out of ignorance and you will also act out of ignorance. The simple question is this: why will you revenge/avenge when no one actually hurt you? No one can hurt you without your permission. When people act untoward to you, your reaction to that act will either encourage them or dissuade them from repeating that action. Forgiveness is what you need when face with this kind of situation. The act of forgiveness erases the past and focuses on the future. Remember: we all need second chance to reform from our old way of acting (the ego dominated way of behaving).